Sunday, September 12, 2004
heartbroken. crushed.
Feel as though i've been betrayed..when actually i don't think i have been.Heartbroken. Definitely. Then again, nothing really happened.
Crushed. That was what i felt when i saw him walking with two other girls during lunch and the fact that he seemed to act as though he didn't see me.
Disappointed. That's what i feel whenever i see him online, and i'm online and -yes- available for a chat, yet he doesn't talk to me.
Estatic. Always, whenever he does the simplest of things, like saying hi to me in the mornings; giving me taps on the back just so that i'll know he's around.
Think this -whole- thing is getting too far. Nothing and i really mean -nothing- like this has -ever- happened to me before and it's not going to get me down. it's not. At least i'm making sure it doesn't.
Maybe i'm thinking too much. Maybe it's all a one-sided affair. No wait. I am thinking more than i should, and it is one-sided.
There's an aching longingness to confess, but I know that if i do, i shall be regretting it for the rest of my life. Guess the best solution is just to contain this whole self-deprecating nonsense within me myself and to move on as though nothing has ever been felt towards him.
Shall morph into one of those feministic, independent, cynical, judgemental and sophisticated females of the twenty-first century.
sarah at 1:20 pm