Monday, February 28, 2005

stuffy.

it seemed like a never-ending period of dry spell going on, causing little (okay,not really little) bush-fires to spring up all over the island during these past few weeks. and now, i'm sitting in my room, my stuffy room watching the rain go pitter patter on the windows outside. hm. guess the government doesn't have to worry too much about inadequate water supplies. bet they must have consulted the weather station before that report on the news just a few days back. humps.

goodbye dry spell, hello wet days !

better make a conscious effort to take my brollie whenever i go out for lessons these days. the weather is so unpredictable.

my nose had been stuffy ever since the start of the day making it quite hard to concentrate hard on the lecture and jot down notes since tilting my head down only serves to make the runny mucus drip faster (newton's law of gravity applies). then again, is stuffy the right word to use for describing the excruciating discomfort felt whenever a bad case of sinus acts up ? we don't use stuffy to describe the state of the nose, instead, it's used to describe a feeling caused by the nose. hms. linguistics. and i'm not going to go further into it.

today's lecture on semantics already made me go huh! momentarily a few times during the lecture. yah. and i never knew the english language to be so complicated. inherent abilities like grammatical and contextual competancy are things that i admit, i have been taking for granted. one simple example being, when someone asks ,"Do you know the time now?", although we know that this is a yes/no question, yet, we still give the actual time as stated on our watches. and so a more expected answer would be 'it's 6pm' rather than ' yes, i know the time now.'
language is amazingly complicated. haha. no one said learning a new language was easy.

deviating from the topic severely again.. (whats new).. i declare that sleeping in air-con through-out the night is not not not good. (3 nots= 1 not) firstly, it causes your throat to have the dry feeling as though all moisture from your throat has been sucked away. also, your lips become dry and reddish as well, a sign of mild dehydration(in my opinion). Lastly, your face feels flaky and dry. in short, everything becomes dry. you may think, oh, if thats the case, i can always drink more water before i sleep. hahah. drinking water just before you sleep causes water retention which results in puffy eye bags and a slight puffiness of the face. hows that.

in short, i hate sleeping in air-con.

colourless green ideas sleep furiously.

sarah at 4:12 pm

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Friday, February 18, 2005

whoosh!

slosh. poof. bleah. hahs.
i'm just playing around with word-sounds, or sound-words, however you call them. hahaha. lame. yeah.

whooped (another sound-word!) down a huge serving of Al-funghi at Munchie monkey's just now. i think it's getting too creamy for me. wondered how i managed a plate of that, plus italian chocolate cake, and a strawberry soda all in one meal.. crazy stuff. now i know where all the extra weight came from. bleah. Oh, and i remembered one of the waiters there. think he's a sheares' handballer.. HAHAHa. ok. nothing personal with the peeps in orange, just that, he just gave me a grim reminder of those ihg days and all the shitified politics that went on. gulps.

music's blasting take on me... take me on.. can't remember the title of this song. all i recall is A1 singing the cover for this as well. baahaa. the lyrics are cheesy. ah well. aren't most song lyrics these days ? hm.
oh whoa. Savage garden's to the moon and back playing now. nice song. nice nice nice. :)

kinda side-tracked alittle. haha. and i'm not going to remind myself of the *still mountain of work which only seems to pile higher and not get lower by blogging anything on work, lab reports, readings yadder yadder..
mid-semester break kinda started for me today, since i had no lessons today. haha. self-declared early holiday ya. i'm always doing such stuff. you know it's really ironic, how time passes all so quickly when you're in the midst of enjoyment and fun, and how it lags for somewhat like eternity whenever you're suffering or well, not really enjoying doing what you do. that's exactly how i feel now. the past 2 years in JC seemed like eternity to me. well, it felt longer than a year in sec school, at least for me. and now, i cant believe half a semester is over-and-done-with. soon, i'm entering year 2, while being still quite clueless of what to expect of university life. seriously, i need to do something. reflecting on the past doesn't really help psyche myself up for what's in store, it only serves to make me dwell on my past achievements (doesn't it apply to most people as well?) and causes me to stagnate with so much inertia such that i probably need a trailer of 30 horse-power to get me moving again. hahaha. i'm talking so metaphorically. BAHAhahah. *act like*

i miss meeting up with old friends, especially those guy-friends of mine back in fairfield. somehow, i still feel that they belong to the group of nicest guys that i know (up till now). pity how NS made contacting each other, meeting up for coffee and chatting on the phone seem so much harder though technology is advancing wayyyy too fast for me to even say fragilisticaspialadocious. yeah. still remembered how they whined and complain of overseas trips to brunei and thailand and where-else; getting lost in jungles, and having to survive on pathetic ration-packets (which i thought the biscuits were quite tasty.haha) and most importantly, getting seperated from their family and loved ones (gf's included). NS is one stage of life where i wouldn't mind going thru except for the whole biased-ness towards the femme fetale. humps. and i thought we were moving towards a society where democracy and equality (at least) is becoming a basic human right.

and i did realised i'm getting lost in my own thoughts. before i get too out of point, i'd better stop now.
Oh, and my ou xiang had a haircut. i thought he looked quite good, albeit a little ah beng, but at least he has sei. HAhahaha. ok. shall stop obsessing. ^_^

things i did this week :

sarah at 3:50 pm

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Sunday, February 13, 2005

woozy.

no idea what woozy means, but i guess that was what i'd been feeling for the past week.
slept and slept as though i was trying to sleep my way to clear off my accumulated sleep-debt for the past ten years.and with that, i'm now left with mountains of work *still to be done and which were supposed to have been cleared off by friday. sigh.

i'm not going to go on and on about how this year's new year went. all i'll say is, the festive mood didn't really hit me hard this year. well, it hasn't been hitting me hard ever since i turned 16, but that's not the point.
point is, i'm feeling alittle sick of traditions and the whole mundaness of the whole chinese new year buzz; the visiting of relatives, eating new year 'goodies'(badies more like it, am now suffering from a probable onset of Flu and a bulging wasitline, but whats new.. ^_^).. what i'm saying is, why do we have to wait till new year to do such visitations, to have a nice meal with everyone in the family, to pay respects to our elders? humans are just uncomprehendable.

well, valentine's day is tomorrow but it's just going to be anyother day for me, except that i'll be seeing more exotic flowers around, apart from the usual and common bougenvilla, and girls being nicer to the guys in a hope of getting one of the extra stalks of roses that he's bought but doesn't know who to give to. hiakhiak. i sound disillusioned.

anyway, to everyone; have a great day tomorrow.. enjoy the love that's gonna be spreading like wildfire everywhere and go light on the chocolates.

say hi to the monday blues...

sarah at 9:09 pm

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Tuesday, February 08, 2005

constantine!

argh!
the whole post got deleted and i have NO IDEA how.
and i can't even change the colour of the font or bold it. WHAT IS THIS.

haikz.
so sianz to have to try to recall my previous post and re-type it here. and i shall not bother to do that.

like my title mentioned, the supposed-to-be-here entry was about the keanu reeves' movie Constantine. constantine rings the name constance in my head though there's virtually no connection between these two names. haha.

the alphabet Z reminds me of something my friends and i chanced upon on the talking-cork website by colin goh.
notice there isn't any singlish words begining with Z. main reason is because singlish-users tend to pronounce Z as J. so instead of getting 'the zebra in the zoo', we have 'the Jebra in the Joo.' pretty amusing stuff if you ask me.

talking about Zs and Js, i'm due to do a project for my E-lang module on language. 1000 word write up excluding diagrams, illustrations etc. Bahahahah. and it's due in march. that leaves hardly 2 months to the due date.

work seems to be piling higher and higher while i'm getting less and less productive and effecient. i'm begining to feel like a poor, ordinary middle-class person getting stranded in the whole work cycle. thing is, competition is so stiff such that you have to constantly maintain the work effeciency in order to stay 'up'. and this whole nonsense reminds me of how we have to constantly upgrade or change our PCs and handphones since they get horrifically obselete so quickly. i'm feeling qutie stifled, albeit alittle suffocated from work and readings now. maybe its the lack of proper blood circulation now that IHG trainings and games have ended. the importance of sports. hehs. ^_^

been straying away from the title to much.
all i can say is, not sure if Constantine has been rated M18. even if it has, i'm glad to be 19. Hahahahah.

it's gonna be a long holiday week. wait, holiday.. i don't think so.

sarah at 1:18 am

Friday, February 04, 2005

normalcy.

not sure if that's how it's being spelt but yeah, you know what i meant to say.

IHG season has officially ended for me and i'm actually feeling more relieved than i ought to. well, most people would expect me to feel sorry or regretful at not being able to play certain matches 'cos of my silly injuries, but, amazingly, i feel utterly fine at how everything is finally over. guess i had been subconsciously looking forward to today ever since trainings started. baaahaa. and i'm begining to sound like a mugger/phantom (thats the term for those 'hardly-seen-and-only-appear-for-meals-and-block-suppers people), or maybe, that's what i'd want to become.

im becoming alittle sianz of hall life. productivity-wise, i feel more 'accomplished' when at home.. hall life just sucks the energy out of me with the energy being channelled to everywhere else except to where it matters most, my books. even now, its closing 11pm, and i havent got a single piece of work done, except with fiddling around with excel, DESPERATELY trying to insert some function to help me calculate 80-over readings so that i can plot the graph and get the whole EXCEL-bit out of my mind and enjoy the weekend.

and i did realise that was a really long sentence. Baah!

i'm kinda dreading my EL tutorials. well, for one, we get graded based on class participation and how active you are and active implies how outspoken you are, how well-formed and constructive your arguments and comments are. and as for someone like me, i'm thankful that i'm not in arts. seriously. essays, discussions, projects and presentations in front of tonnes of starring eyes are just not for me.

oh no. haha. got interupted with doing my excel table and graph.
FINALLY, i've finished the table and the graph, though i still am clueless about inserting functions to allow the programme to do complex calculations for you. hehs.

weekend's finally here and boy am i glad to go home. i miss home.

want to snuggle under my blanket with my pillows and bolster while plugging onto my iPod, listening to the smooth voices of Ono lisa and Ann Sally, the celestial voices of Josh Groban that never fails to impress me, and sappy tunes from westlife to you hong ming. ahhh.

sarah at 10:42 pm

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Tuesday, February 01, 2005

feeling drained.

my printer has a huge appetite for ink. either that, or the ink is lousy, apart from the fact that i have to wait a long time for the ink to dry otherwise i'd end up with special unwanted shadowy effects each time i highlight stuff in the notes. irritating.

today's a good day. i can literally smell it in the air.
and i love the smell of clothes warm and fresh from the dryer (though i shudder at the thought of using the washing machines and the dryers in hall..hiaks).
i'm drained. not quite physically but more of mentally. i have problems thinking of what to blog on these days. then again, i may not actually be drained.
the inspiration to blog comes only when you face crisis/problems in your life, or when your life is kinda like the happening sort; driving out for late night suppers everynight, waking up only when it's past 11 in the morning, skipping lectures and having to end up watching webcasts, taking part in literally every single IHG sport and culture event in hall, attending lectures half dead even though it's 10 in the morning.. bah!

i seem to be re-iterating hall life again and again somehow in my entries, and i have no idea why.

my friend once commented that the reason why i might still be single is 'cos i look as though i'm not ready or at least, i don't feel the need to settle down with someone yet. i agree fully. why look to such b-g-relationships to find security and warmth when i have a loving, caring family plus an awesome God who watches over me every single second of my life.

i love my life irregardless of how i get envious of those blessed with more intellect, talent and good looks than myself, of how i whine and complain over matters that are actually so simple and trivial but i blew them up out of self-pity sake, of how i always yearn for the have-nots even though God has been really good to me, of how i always drift away from God but He never fails to remind me of His love and welcome me back into his arms just like the prodigal's son.

think i might be feeling delusional about B-G relationships such that i don't trust myself being in one. more importantly, i think i'm phobic about ending up with the wrong type of guy and of myself committing too much into it such that i lose myself and neglect those close to me, families and friends included. ^_^ Being phobic about my studies getting affected when my occupation states 'full-time student', afraid of all so many things.
fear eats you up.

i'm leaving everything to God. at least, trusting that he'll send someone perfectly right for me all in His perfect timing. :)

when you feel down because you did not get what you want, just sit back and wait, because God has thought of something better to give you. :)




sarah at 9:47 am

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